how wordpress sells your soul

Do you use wordpress to blog?  Thought it a little less contentious than the ever-expanding  über information-hoarder that is google/blogger?  WordPress would have you think that is way cooler and on it’s front page it says “We like to say that WordPress is both free and priceless at the same time“.  Free, maybe.  Priceless, I think not.

If you use wordpress you are inevitably, due to cookies, logged in if you view your blog or another blog on wordpress.    And if you are logged in to wordpress, there is a little detail that is kept from your delicate little eyes.  Adverts.

They are not so crass as to load the ads up on your home page, that would be a bit to obvious and you might spot it.  And you might object.  But if a non wordpress person views a  page individually (which is the normal route through words entered into a search engine), your new reader gets the ads at the bottom of the post.  I just spent 5 minutes with an old post and the F5 button and the following companies are advertising on my blog.

Groupon
David Lloyd Leisure
Dfs
Creditreport
Kuoni (who-oni?)
Specsavers (FFS!)
Churchill Insurance
Alpari (eh?)
Groupon (again)
Groupon (what the fuck is groupon anyway?)
Adoptuskids.org (they didn’t think that through did they?)
Tesco (natch)
Royal Caribbean International
Sky news.  No, really.
 
I suspect I could wear out the F5 button before the variety of ads stop. 
 
There am I, and quite possibly you too, having your service provider using your innocent little witterings to sell advertising space to  Rupert Murdoch  Satan.
 
You happy with that?  Because I’m not.
 
Don’t have a picture, but for once do have a splendid piece of musical architecture by The Aphex Twin which seems entirely apposite.  Do  yourself a favour, and turn the volume on and up.
 
 
Laters, yeah?
 

hello little doggy!

doggy doing little

 

Aren’t you a happy little doggy!

Daddy has taken you for a walk on the beach hasn’t he!  Lots to smell and dig and wee on isn’t there!  Little doggy is having a great time isn’t he!  No lead out here is there doggy?  You can run in the dunes and splash in the sea and dig in the sand and chase the gulls and bark and bark and nobody say shutupdog!  No they don’t!

What’s that doggy?  You need to do a doggy-doo?  Well feel free, just go wherever you want to!  It doesn’t matter, you can just do what you did yesterday and just do a doggy-doo in the dunes.  And the same as  you did the day before yesterday, and the day before that. And then you can carry on smelling and running and wee-ing!  In fact just go ahead and  add another to the hundreds of little lumps of doggy-doo that Daddy has let you do on the beach in the last year.  It’s ok, he is a proper Daddy and will clean up after you and dispose of your shit responsibly won’t he!  Won’t he?

Of course not.  Because you haven’t done it in the street little doggy, and because nobody can see you do it, he can just leave it where it pops out of your stinky doggy arse and move on!  Yes he can.  And so can most of the other doggy Daddies and Mummies on the beach!  It’s easy!  No plastic bags to worry about!  No carrying stinky canine shits around with you!  Just leave it on the beach or in the dunes several hundred times a year!  Do the mathematics little doggy.  Ten dogs a day (a conservative underestimation) 300 or so days a year and you have thousands of lumps of dog shit spread around the beach. I don’t blame you little doggy – just your stupid lazy ignorant self-centred bastard of a daddy. Thankyou so much dog owners, this end of town looks like shit, and thanks to you it regularly smells of shit. You shits.