how wordpress sells your soul

Do you use wordpress to blog?  Thought it a little less contentious than the ever-expanding  über information-hoarder that is google/blogger?  WordPress would have you think that is way cooler and on it’s front page it says “We like to say that WordPress is both free and priceless at the same time“.  Free, maybe.  Priceless, I think not.

If you use wordpress you are inevitably, due to cookies, logged in if you view your blog or another blog on wordpress.    And if you are logged in to wordpress, there is a little detail that is kept from your delicate little eyes.  Adverts.

They are not so crass as to load the ads up on your home page, that would be a bit to obvious and you might spot it.  And you might object.  But if a non wordpress person views a  page individually (which is the normal route through words entered into a search engine), your new reader gets the ads at the bottom of the post.  I just spent 5 minutes with an old post and the F5 button and the following companies are advertising on my blog.

Groupon
David Lloyd Leisure
Dfs
Creditreport
Kuoni (who-oni?)
Specsavers (FFS!)
Churchill Insurance
Alpari (eh?)
Groupon (again)
Groupon (what the fuck is groupon anyway?)
Adoptuskids.org (they didn’t think that through did they?)
Tesco (natch)
Royal Caribbean International
Sky news.  No, really.
 
I suspect I could wear out the F5 button before the variety of ads stop. 
 
There am I, and quite possibly you too, having your service provider using your innocent little witterings to sell advertising space to  Rupert Murdoch  Satan.
 
You happy with that?  Because I’m not.
 
Don’t have a picture, but for once do have a splendid piece of musical architecture by The Aphex Twin which seems entirely apposite.  Do  yourself a favour, and turn the volume on and up.
 
 
Laters, yeah?
 
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lists

Lists are updated, which is timely.  Despite the patch year being only eight days old, I have yet to see a Med.  This is a little embarrassing really.  But I remember the days that I would yearn for a Med on my patch.  These days I know that it inevitabubble, which is nice.

Have a picture of a suffolk gull.

a gull doing flying in the direction it didn't when the camera was in the case

listing update

 

All the lists on this weblog are up to date – feel free to click on them and then to stare at your computer with slack jawed disbelief at the quality on show.  Or tut, knowing that the numbers should be higher. .  I know that one of them is empty, but it is correct.

Would you like a picture?  Would you?

a kestrel doing listed

sunset

great yarmouth doing alright

diver down?

No, not the Van Halen album, and actually not statistically accurate as quite the opposite was in effect yesterday as it was Divers Up!  Which isn’t the title of an album by Van Halen.

Basically yesterday was full patch divering.  The facts are this.  Early morning –  Great Northern Diver on the sea.  Lunchtime – 106 Red-throated Divers flying north.  106.  Yes, that does read one hundred and six.  I know this because I used my county thing (scroll down to a previous post if you missed this monumental purchasing event).  I didn’t start using my county thing because I didn’t expect to see 106 of them.  I started on one hand and by the time my proverbial  boots were off, I decided to use the counter and then they came and came and came.  Ones, twos, half a dozen, a dozen etc etc.  Bloody brilliant it was.  Abso-bloody-lutely brilliant.  There was a few Guillemots buzzing past too, and just before my time was up a Razorbill landed on the sea.  And that is a patch tick.  Absolute top notchness for a whole hour.

The keen eyed Norfolk birder may well have ignored the previous paragraph once they saw the words ‘Great Northern’ and will be looking for masses of information on the ID  and some will wonder why oh why oh why it wasn’t on Birdalertpagerguides?  But then again, they probably stopped reading this drivel months ago.  All the same,  I’ll probably get accused of being a suppressionist for not shaating about the siting the moment I confirmed the ID, but there you go.  I did have to go to my place of employ immediately and it wasn’t there later in the day so that’s about the size of it. 

Here is a shit photo record shot…

 

a diver doing great
And here is another, which looks a bit less like a Guillemot…
 
a diver doing northern

Before I left site I also had cracking views of a Black Redstart.  Patch birding, eh?

birds what I saw recently

Sanderlings (up to eight!) are knocking about in their winter whiteness but strangely no Snow Buntings even though they are being seen in Caister.

Yesterday brought a Red-throated Diver, Black Redstart and no Kittiwakes.

Er, Turnstones.  And Meadow Pipits.

Gulls, yes! Gulls!  Lots of gulls, including floaty meds.  But not so many GBB.

Um, Cormorants.

And barring an occasional Peregrine and Pied Wagtails, that is about a whole week in a patch in one tidy post.

Lush.

not completely boring though

Recently, the patch birding has been dominated by seawatching (which I am still carrying out in inappropriate windage) but it has been enjoyable.  There, I said it.  I enjoy seawatching.  It’s not because I see loads of cracking birds when I do it, because I don’t.  It’s a more philosophical thing.  If I had more wine inside me I may have felt compelled to qualify this, but I haven’t. 

But there are  birds.  This week has been spent watching Kittiwakes amongst the other gulls.  Due to their wheeling tendency there have been between three and thirty in each session.  I suspect the former due to the normal lack of birds that I see at sea, but the truth is probably somewhere in the middle.  Mainly adult birds, and lovely and elegant and delicate but robust at the same time.  They really are a treat to watch in a strong wind.

Yesterday, I watched a Peregrine come in off the sea carrying prey.  Due to the colour (blackish) and the length of the legs (longish) I instantly thought Moorhen.  Which would be a patch tick.  I have ticked flat fish in the gob of a Cormorant and Sand Eels in the ‘marf’ of a Common Tern, but they were twitching.  The boid that the Peregrine had was properly dead, and not tickable (patch rule 14 – Thou shalt not ticketh the dead aviform).

turned off

That stupid bloody snow that wordpress automatically turn on each year.  Did I ask for snow on my blog?  Of course I didn’t.  Did I ask for lots of interesting birds to write about?  Of course I did.  Still, you can’t have everything I guess.

a gull doing reasonably normal

 Mrs Thing likes Herring Gulls, so I take photos of them.  Can’t blame her when they look like this…

this will be a patch tick …

… eventually.

When I get round to the identification that is. 

a mushroom doing fun guy. sorry.

 

Which will require the purchase of a book of course.  Annoying eh, another one of those paper things with words in to add to all the others. Gutted.

 

hooky

Nice year tick today with a Grey Wagtail, only my second in this patch. Lovely little bird that I don’t see enough of lately.  Fair few Pied, but as handsome as they are I do prefer their Grey cousin.

Lately the birding has been dominated by seawatching.  This has generally been dominated by Great Black-backed Gulls interspersed with very occasional little black things steaming past that I cannot identify. Largely due to the distance rather than my inability to identify little black things that steam past, which is in itself quite vast.  This is quite typical of my seawatching experience and I love it. 

Let’s have a picture of one of them there gulls eh?

 

great black backed doing 2nd winter, or possibly not

What a beast!  Just look at the hook on it!  Look at that mantle!  Yummy!

the previous post in a visual stylee

Two birds.

two birds doing looking a bit brown at distance

 

A bird.

a bird doing not sleeping for once

The other one.

a second bird doing patch tick

 

a butterfly

Small copper I think you’ll find.  Been seeing a few, but this is the first one that sat still enough to get a shot of.

a butterfly doing tatty

near miss

It seemed that Friday was a good day for a seawatch.   I mean, a Fea’s Petrel flew past the evening before.  How good does it need to get? What with the patch being by the sea, it seemed a good idea to then proceed to sea and watch it.  Getting ready for ‘the big one’.  The patch tick of patch ticks.  A rare seabird.  Lets go!

The first Brents of the winter, some Wigeon, some Scoters.  No shearwaters, certainly not any Cory’s.  Or Gannets.  Some gulls.  No skuas. Some terns.  Hmmm.  But then!   Hang on one a second there is a small dark bird with a white rump flying almost on the waves!!! Bloody hell!  It couldn’t be could it?  Where has it gone?  Find it find it!  Oh, what is that what has gone and landed on that there rock.  Oh, it is a Wheatear. 

Swallow anyone?

a swallow doing not long now

stink on stink on stink

Do you remember those cans of ‘fart gas’ that you could buy when you were a kid?

a can doing pthfhwahyeurrknoaaaargh!

It would generally waste a large chunk of the pocket money that you had saved up for the annual summer holiday, having purchased it after falling for the illusion of actually having a real can of real flatus.  The reality was that the smell was rank, but not really that similar to proper anal gaseous discharge.  When I say rank, I mean rank.  Proper rank.  Not enough to produce instant projectile vomiting (that would be amaaaaazing), but enough to clear a ridge tent in quick time, even in the rain.  Chemically mixed rankness in spray form.  The smell contained in these containers was definitely not pleasant.  I wouldn’t go as far as saying that it was some concoction from the depths of hell, but certainly a little lister demon that may have passed this region had given a little whisper in the ear of the creator of fart gas.  You don’t remember fart gas?  Oh.

Compared to what I had whaft under my nostrils on Friday, cans of fart gas are about as unpleasant as fresh honeysuckle.  Here is a picture of something that really does smell.  Technically, this thing here “really really fucking stinks”.

a horn doing stink

 

As I approached it, the smell situation wasn’t in my mind but once I got close and the hoard of flies vacated the whaft whafted.  Rankness of another level.  Needless to say, this is a pan species patch tick and evidently it has a rude sounding scientific name – Phallus impudicus.  Gurgle.

rainy double patch tick whammy

So I went out into the patch and it looked like this.

sky doing just you wait sonny

Understandably, I started getting rained on.  So I retreated to the shelter of a nearby motorised vehicle and by the magic of the internal combustion engine I found myself by an area of scrubland.  Actually it is desolate industrial wasteground, but scrub makes it sound all wild and authentic and everything.  Bored out of my patch mind by the lack of birds to watch I even ended up taking pictures of a bird I don’t like.

a wood pigeon doing rubbish

I muttered, and took the Lords name in vain with reference to the rubbishness of local birds etc.  I mean Wrynecks are stalking local dunes, but not mine.  Greenish Warblers are being found in bushes a mere few miles away, but not here.  All I have is a Wood Pigeon.  And those Sparrows.  And that Blue Tit.  FFS.  Blue Tit?  But that would be a member of an entire family of birds that do not present themselves around here at all.  Have I fallen into the complacency of the common place again?  Yes!  Patch tick! Niiiiice!  Better get the bins out then and look at it properly.  It’s a respect thing.  But hang on, what is that flicky thing that is with the Tit and Sparrows in that rubbish bit of scrub/wasteland.  Oh it seems to look like a warbler.  At 8x magnification it revealed itself to be no less than a Chiffchaff.  Another bleeding patch tick!  Shmokin!

One rain shower for me, two photos for you dear reader, and a rambling post about two patch ticks.  Splendid.